28

I suffer from imposter syndrome pretty much all the time. I sit around and wonder “Who the hell am I? Why should anybody listen to me? How mad are people going to be when they realize I’m not everything?” I always feel like I haven’t accomplished enough, and even though I’m pretty good at telling myself that’s what constitutes my drive, some days I feel it more keenly than others.

I won’t let today be one of those days. I’m 28 today. I’ve reached the point where I have to stop and think when somebody asks how old I am. I own a house I thought I could only dream of. I have an amazing son and a wonderful spouse. I have a fantastic job that’s evolved along with me into being something that truly fits, and the best coworkers I could ask for. I have a car, a piano, my own home office, and a general overabundance of material things. I eat well, I find a reason to laugh hysterically just about every day, and I can honestly say that on the whole I’m happy as opposed to sad or angry.

10 years ago, I was legally and functionally an adult. A sad and angry adult. I felt like I had been an adult for some time already, making adult decisions and having adult finances before I was really ready. But now I feel like a grown up, and you know what: I am an accomplished grown up and I am proud of that. It’s a good birthday.

4 responses to “28”

  1. I’m glad I’m not alone. I feel like everything I’ve learned and done in the past is useless sometimes. Every time I blink the world passes me by.

    All that school homework… all those projects done and left in the corporate world… buried in the past, too outdated to look good on my portfolio.

    Once I used to be a whiz programming 3D engines, and now I’m learning basic 3D in CSS and WebGL.

    Well, as they say… keep calm and qwerty on!

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